Been too long

February has swept in and I realize that it has been such a long time since I have blogged.  I continue to steadily lose weight.  My skin is sagging in places that I never imagined I would have sagging skin, but I consider this sagging skin a temporary badge of accomplishment.  I say temporary because I know through toning I will be able to correct some of this and what I cannot correct through toning I will have surgically corrected when the time is right, if necessary.  Even if I must keep this extra skin, it is better than the fat that I have been carrying around for 15+ years.  My son commented a few days ago that even the skin on my arms (the skin that I call "granny bat wings") seems to be going away a little bit.  It is so exciting to hear my kids notice things like this.  My 8 year old daughter hugs me now and is able to wrap her arms around my body and her fingers touch for the first time in her whole life.  She is ecstatic by this seemingly small accomplishment.  My 4 year old daughter looks at the pictures that I have taken along the way and says "remember when you looked like that mom?", like it was a long time ago.  I find it hard to believe that it hasn't even been a year yet and I have come this far!
    Today I got down on my hands and knees and scrubbed my kitchen floor.  This seems like an ordinary, mundane task.  But believe me this isn't ordinary to me!  I haven't been able to do it for years.  I have relied on my wonderful husband to do tasks like this for me.  Bless his heart, he always did it and NEVER complained.  Today I felt quite accomplished.  Not only did I scrub the floor on my hands and knees I didn't struggle to get back up.  This is another milestone that I have passed!  The last 10 months have gone by so fast and I don't feel like it has been hard work.  It is only a short chapter in a lifelong journey.

Staying on track!

It has been a long time since I have posted anything!  I just want to report that I have been staying on track.  I saw Dr. Smith on Thursday and he was very pleased with my progress.  I have lost 25 pounds since I have seen him last.  He is very excited about my progress.  I have to admit I am too!!  I am starting to shrink out of all of my clothes again, but that is OK.  I know that they make more and soon I will be able to buy clothes from nearly any store I go into.  No more shopping exclusively at Fashion Bug or Lane Bryant!  That will feel sooo good!!!  I still can't believe how much my body has changed and how much the decision to have this surgery has changed my life!  I seriously wish I had done it 10 years ago.  It is a little weird for me because I still see the body I had before I lost all of this weight.  I really have to stand still and concentrate on what is really there, not what my mind still sees.  I know it will take time and I know my brain will catch up with the rest of me.  I can't wait.  For now I will have to settle for putting the pictures of my progress side by side.

Happy Thursday!!!  Today I am happy to report that the scale says I am 113 pounds lighter than I was 7 months  ago.  If you would have told me in March or April of this year that I would be 113 pounds down by October I would have laughed very loudly!!  But it is true.  When I got dressed this morning I put on the top that I wore to my birthday party that was held August 27th.  I can see such a difference in the way that it fits.  I thought it fit really well the night of my party, but wearing it today I feel much more comfortable in it.

I see Dr. Smith again next month.  He will be so pleased to see my continued progress.  I am slowly getting back to exercising since my gall bladder surgery.  Went for a long walk yesterday and am planning to go a little further today.  I am really beginning to enjoy my walks.  It gives me a little alone time and I know I am doing something positive for my health.  

100 pounds of flab off my frame, 100 pounds of flab...

So, I have hit the 100 pound mark!  Unfortunately, with that goal reached my gall bladder had to come out.  Wow, am I ever sore!!  Slowly but surely I am recovering.  The key word here is slowly!

I was getting ready to go to my son's football game.  I went and grabbed a pair of jeans off of my pile of clean clothes and put them on.  Imagine my surprise when I pulled them up and went to zip them up and realized that I was holding on to about 8 inches of extra material.  I was shocked!  I'm saving those pants.  Not because I will ever be able to wear them again, but because they represent how far I have come.  I put them on for my family later that night and we had a good laugh!

Lucky for me, my friend Chrys had given me boxes of clothing that she has shrunken out of.  I have casual clothes that fit again!  It is such a crazy feeling.  I pull clothes out of the totes that she has given me and I hold them up and say there is NO WAY I'm going to fit into that. But I put them on and they zip without any struggle.  I put on tops that aren't rolling up or too short so my belly button sticks out.  I still can't believe that this is MY body!  I sometimes wake up expecting that I have been dreaming and am back up to the heaviest weight I have ever been.  Every day that I wake up feeling that way I pinch myself just to make sure that it is real life.  So far, It's been real life and I like it!

I started a new friendship recently.  A lady that had her surgery yesterday!!  I am happy to report that all went well for her and she is on her way to her new life.  I love being able to be supportive to someone who is following the same path that I have been on.  It makes me stay focused on my journey while feeling like I am lending a hand to a friend in need.  I think I might take some public speaking classes so that I can share my experience, my excitement and my enthusiasm with others.  Not that I have any trouble talking in front of a group, I don't.  I think just that with a little coaching I could be very motivational.  Funny where life can take you when you have the confidence and the knowledge!

91 pounds, yes I said 91 pounds!!

I wanted to blog this once I hit 90, but ATT made it impossible because they were having issues in my neighborhood and couldn't fix it in a timely manner.  I was without internet for 7 days!!
  I can't believe I have lost 91 pounds!!!  That is 1/4 of my starting weight.  So now you can calculate just how much I weighed before I had my surgery.  I am so proud of me, but at the same time I am ashamed that I ever let myself get to that point.
 I have finally gone shopping and gotten myself some new scrubs.  I was at the point where my tops were so big I was getting caught on door knobs.  One of my supervisors actually stapled the excess material together so I didn't look so ridiculous. Once she did that I realized just how big my clothes really were.  I am having a little trouble adjusting to the new clothes because I have worn big baggy things for so long. I find that I am constantly pulling and tugging at my clothes.  It will take time for me to get used to wearing clothes that actually fit. For so long when I felt uncomfortable in my clothes I would just get a bigger size.  Those days are over!!  When I start feeling uncomfortable in my clothes now it will probably mean it's time to get smaller ones.  I am so looking forward to reaching the big 1 0 0 !!!  I know it's just around the corner...

85 pounds

85 pounds have fallen off of this frame of mine.  I feel good and I know that I still have a long way to go.  I as happy with my progress.  What I really need to do is start walking again or get back to the gym.  I know it is the key to continuing on this journey and doing as well as I was before.  I have a treadmill in the basement that looks like I have been using it for a closet.  I guess it's time for me to get that under control and get to stepping.

Been too long

It's  been way too long since I've blogged!  We just got back from vacation. We went to Mackinaw City, Michigan and stayed for 6 days.  What a wonderful time.  The weather was beautiful and we couldn't have asked for better service.  The hard part was choosing the right foods.  We ate out for nearly every meal and everything looked delicious.  But all in all I still lost weight.  I am down a total of 76 pounds.(that is almost as much as both of my daughters weigh together!!!)  I think if I had been home and able to eat my regular food at my regular times I would be down a little more, but I am thankful that I  am where I am.  It seems so unreal that I have lost this much weight.  I still have a hard time believing that I have lost it.  I still see myself as I was at my largest (I can't believe I am saying this out loud again, but I was up to 357pounds!!).  I can't look at a pair of pants or any other article of clothing, for that matter, and judge correctly if it will fit or not.  I think that was the hardest thing about packing for vacation.  I used to know what fit and I was just able to throw it in the suitcase and go.  This time I had to try everything on before we went. something I noticed while we were on vacation: I still turn sideways to fit through places where I will clearly fit through just passing through normally, I guess it will just take time to get used to it.  After all, it has only been 4 months since my surgery.